So here’s what happened…

Thursday morning I put my makeup on as well as my Ripley dress and my blue suede heels and waited for my parents and Stepbro to arrive to take me to THE meeting with my Consultant.  Here it was – after all the sleepless nights it was time.

Why sleepless nights? Because I knew we had “shinkage”.  Now “shrinkage” could go several ways… “yes it’s shrunk so we just have to give you a teeny bit more chemo/radiotherapy …” or even “yes, shrinkage, it’s all gone so continue your life as normal”.  The former was the reason for the sleepless nights.  Yes, I can do it but oh please I don’t want to.

We got there and waited.  It was an hour which I was used to but now I had to make conversation about the riots and things and I was very aware that when somebody came through the door this was it.  I remember clearly at one stage thinking it would be bad news and wondering what would I do?  I waited.  I smiled and joined in.

It was finally time to go in.  I gave my consultant 2 kisses (for luck).  He seemed to take ages to get the images on the screen.  February – now.  February’s image was large and shadowy – August’s …..well, I squinted but couldn’t really see properly.  So the words “shrunk to the point of mainly just scarring” took a while to sink in.  Is taking a while ….

It’s not over Dear Reader, but I have more time …